confessions

so i kind of want to see the movie "sherlock holmes" because i secretly have a crush on jude law.

yes, i said it.

i do realize that jude law is like the skeeziest of the skeezy, which normally is not my type, but there is something about him that i find so appealing... he could totally use and abuse me.

well i'll be!

i recently discovered that elliott smith actually resides at community care nursing home in south chicago, contrary to popular belief.

he's duped us all these years...

http://grammar.quickanddirtytips.com/good-versus-well.aspx

Call me a snob, but it really REALLY bothers me when people say, "I am well" in response to the question, "How are you?" They always say it with such pretentious confidence, too, as if they are intelligent and you are not. I've tried arguing this point several times with several people but nobody really knows/cares. I'm glad we've settled this.

In other news, I was a caterpillar for halloween.

(taken the day before, prior to acquiring a black turtleneck)

bastards

i got a rejection letter from a job that i had rejected two days prior. they apparently felt the need to get the last word in.

today mayo and i found the most beautiful mustard yellow, tweed sofa at the salvation army, but it was SOLD!!! to a woman named angela. that bitch. we tried to conjure up ways to snatch the gem, like coming in tomorrow and posing as angela. but i'm positive that the lady at the cash register works there every single day. and her mind is a pearl.

i really have lost the desire to go out these days. i'd rather just eat dried fruit and look for couches on my mactop. BUT I WILL GO GREAT LENGTHS TO GO TO A CIDER MILL!!! for real, people. i thrive off of these seasonal activities. or just talking about doing them and never following through.

a client told me that i look exactly like joan of arc. i later googled pictures and discovered that i look nothing like joan of arc. he is one of those rare birds who can go into a deep, intelligent discussion about the symbolism in dante's inferno and then shit his pants two minutes later. great guy.

eating my feelings

can one ever have too much asparagus?

save shorekare...

the state hasn't closed our doors yet, and i'm already mourning the death of hubbard...

nothing is more depressing than job searching when i'm perfectly content with the one i have.

i just realized that this is the first time i'm actually feeling affected by this recession.

lyfecantbperfect.

i'm applying for residency at southview manor!

FML

yesterday a client told me that i have a pretty face.
he's almost 100% blind.